and this is this is
half a lifetime’s behaviour change
behaviour change
this is
not
going
to
be
easy
but the indirect
opposite directiveness
is fucking wrong too
more so even
not
going
to
be
easy
if i must
be hard awake determined
cold in the glaring eyes
bright in the head
is that really
the best mindset
for awakening
the mindset opposite
let alone
the what the fuck reaction
i suspect i’ll get
but no action inaction
is anti–solution
not
going
to
be
easy
but is going to be guided
my hard eyed ice
the guide the spear
parting the cold white storm
opening
opening
not
going
to
be
easy