angst cycle (iii) 
[B]
addiction is 
other people in control 
like as
 
insanities when 
a rocket in the neck muscle 
resonant grin cascade 
days soma in a second 
to trough & wasted breath
 
luck for me 
the insanities were dampen 
i’d insisted no 
it worked
 
but they remain 
i dampen ever 
addicted 
& cascade
 
which buggers me with love 
always unwanted by another love 
i let the insane cascade 
the chance to ask or persuade 
but never is it wanted 
always i am forced 
to damp this insane cascade 
before the fall of reason 
before it can persuade
 
diseased by  
is a civil war 
love is
 
i read all kinds of literature saying what a wonderful thing and i find myself thinking why do these people wonderfulise the mourning of sanity the only time i feel pain as intense as love is when close to me have died it is not a nice experience it is in fact 
 
if you want me to love you 
then fucking say so 
don’t just sit there 
enjoying the death of my father
 
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